THE POST OF THE CENTURY!

Get it? My first post was The Blog of the Century and because this will be my last post it will be the post of a century! Its a fun end to my blog. I would continually post but when the summer is here I am doing nothing that will remind me of this year, because this year was hell. I also will forget and I don't have the attention span to sit down each week over the summer and write a blog post, I can barely do it now for a grade.

School was hell this year. I was admitted into a mental hospital and I lost one of my closest friends. I am incredibly happy that this school year is over. There is not an ounce of me that will miss this year but it was a good year for me. Not a god year for me but a good year for me. It sucked but it was necessary in who I am and how my life will turn out.

This might not seem true but trust me, it is.
Photo cred: Advice from Dakota

No, I am not fixed, I still suffer from depression, and I still am in a dark place. I was so used to being in the dark, with being depressed, that the moment I started seeing light it burnt, I hated it, I wanted to stay in the dark. But after having been forced to be exposed to the light I came to not mind it. Some days I still want it to go away so that I can huddle comfortably in the familiar darkness but I do not loath it like I once did. Maybe soon I will start liking the light until it overpowers the darkness and I will live in the light. There will still be shadows and darkness at times, because that will happen, but I won't be crouched living in a pitch black cave like Gollum. Although at first I couldn't stand  the light, after this year I can. I can tolerate my happiness and I don't force myself into old habits that got me into the hospital. So yes, I would have much rather had to not go through this year but it changed me, it has helped me, and I can finally see purpose.

To everyone reading this blog post, being depressed is okay, having a mental illness is okay. It does not make you a freak, or a crazy person, your brain is releasing some bad chemicals but those chemicals do not define you, they are not you. Everyone deserves happiness, and if anyone reading this thinks that they don't, stop. You do. It took me three years to finally discover that I am no exception, that I, along with everyone else, deserve happiness. You deserve happiness.